


Demons

by rinaburkhart



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, One Shot, Rina Week 2020 (HSM: The Series), Suicide Attempt, trigger warning depression, trigger warning self harm, trigger warning suicide, trigger warning suicide attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:40:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24150703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinaburkhart/pseuds/rinaburkhart
Summary: Gina is always there for Ricky, through all his suicide attempts, through everything. She's always there to save him. Things when change when it's no longer Ricky who needs saving.
Relationships: Ricky Bowen & Gina Porter, Ricky Bowen/Gina Porter
Kudos: 12
Collections: Rinaburkhart's rina fics





	Demons

**Author's Note:**

> My one-shot for #rinaweek2020
> 
> Heavily based on the song Demons by Alec Benjamin
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/track/42MwPTHQWWe4WUNwvdUh6Q?si=a5F_GKcPQhCKPlSYWJjQQg

**𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝**

**𝙉𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢, 𝙣𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙚**

**𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙨 𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙛𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙚𝙣𝙙**

**𝘽𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙞’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨**

As Ricky performed ‘Getcha Head in the Game’ with Ej and the rest of the cast, he couldn’t help but feel ecstatic, he was doing something he loved. He sang his heart out on the stage, “ ** _Why am I feeling so wrong? My head’s in the game, but my hearts in the song_** _”_ , with a basketball in hand and the feeling of being pulled up by the harness “ ** _She makes this feel so right, should i go for it_** _”._ Once he reached the top he couldn’t help but look over everyone in the crowd. He turned to where his mom and dad had been sitting, caught by surprise when he saw his mom’s new boyfriend with her. The sight of this guy, a complete stranger to Ricky, kissing his mom’s cheek and wrapping his arm around her completely shook Ricky. Everything went silent and there was only the noise of the basketball falling to the floor.

The silence was broken when Ricky finished his next verse “ **_I gotta shake this, yikes_ ** _ ”  _ and the music continued. Ricky was put back on the floor, but he couldn’t bring himself to finish the rest of the song, he couldn’t shake what he was really feeling, and with that he walked away, leaving the rest of the cast to finish up the song without him.

After the performance was over, he went into the dressing room he shared with Ej. Ej turned to face Ricky, noticing the panicked look on his face

“ **Ricky, what’s going on?** ”

“ **Listen, you need to do the second act, I just, I can’t do it”**

“ **Okay, yeah, I’ll do it** ” Ej wasn't sure why Ricky asked him to do that, but this was his chance to finally play Troy and so he accepted with no questions asked.

Ej walked out the dressing room, more than ready to play Troy. Ricky looked at Ej walk out the door and waited a few seconds until rummaging through his bag, looking for the pain killers Ej kept in there. As Ricky looked at the pill bottle he noticed there were only a few left, but still enough to get what he wanted done. His hands were shaking as he poured all the pills onto his hand, he was going to do it, this was it for him.

That was until he heard a familiar voice echoing through the dressing room.

“ **Ricky?** ”

It was Gina.

* * *

**𝙒𝙚𝙡𝙡, 𝙖𝙩 𝙛𝙞𝙧𝙨𝙩 𝙄 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙄’𝙙 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙬𝙚𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙗𝙮 𝙢𝙮𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛**

**𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙠𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙨 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙚𝙖𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥**

**𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙩𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙖𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙄 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙩**

Ricky was caught by surprise, he thought Gina would be on stage. A part of him was actually glad she showed up, but he really did not want to show it.

“ **Gina? What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be on stage or something** ”

Gina couldn’t take her eyes off the pills in Ricky’s hand,  _ was he really going to go through with that? _

“ **Um, no actually. I’m not in this act, remember?** ”

“ **Oh yeah, right** ”

Ricky looked down at his hand, noticing that Gina had most likely seen the pills and he quickly shoved them back in the bottle and placed it on the table.

Gina didn’t know what to say, or how she would even say it. It wasn’t like she’d never been there before when Ricky tried to do something like this. Something was different, this time she felt like if she hadn’t walked in he would have actually gone through with it. She couldn’t help feel a rush of sadness flow through her as the thought of it consumed her.

“ **Ricky, were you–** ”

“ **Why does it even matter to you, Gina? It’s not like you’re gonna be here for much longer anyways** ”

His tone was different, it was distant, almost like he was trying to push her away.

Gina couldn’t help but feel angry,  _ Why wouldn’t it matter? _

“ **It matters because I freakin’ care about you Ricky!** ”

As Gina raised her voice at him in anger, he couldn’t help but do the same.

“ **Really? You care about me? Because it sure didn’t seem that way when you fucking left and I kept texting you, worried about you and you gave me nothing but silence!”**

For a moment Gina was quiet, she wasn't sure what she should even say, but what she did know was that she did care about him and the fact that he was questioning that angered her even more.

“ **Yeah, Ricky, I do care about you! And you know why I didn’t text you when I left? It was because I knew that eventually you would just forget about me at some point and it would be easier if I just disappeared as if I was never in your life! And by the way, I’m staying here. Ashlyn & Ej offered me a place to stay and my mom agreed to it, but it’s not like you care about that!** ”

Ricky was at a loss for words, but glad that she was staying.

“ **Gina, I could never forget–** ”

Gina cut him off before he could finish, her voice lowered as she had so much left to say. 

“ **Look you can be mad at me for not texting you when I left, but how dare you say I don’t care about you. Because I do care about you Ricky. If I didn’t care I wouldn’t have gone up to you at the skatepark when you were injured or I would have walked right out of your house the minute I saw that you were about to try and overdose on pills. But I did. I did go up to you and I did stay at your house.** ”

Ricky still couldn’t think of anything to say, he just blinked and looked at Gina.

“ **Ricky, I just want you to be okay. So can you please just tell me what happened?** ”

And with that the anger they both felt at the beginning of their conversation had faded away.

* * *

**𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙜𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙝𝙤𝙥𝙚,**

**𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙨**

Ricky, trying to find a way to her question, couldn’t help but remember the image of his mom and a complete stranger.

“ **My mom happened”** he look towards the floor, not making eye contact with Gina for even a second “ **Everything was fine, you know, and then there I was floating in the air and I see it, I see her and her new boyfriend and it just, it felt like a part of me was just completely ripped away”**

Gina just looked at him and listened, she knew there was more to it.

“ **And that’s all of it? Or is there something you’re leaving out?** ”

He looked up at her,  _ how did she know there was more to it? _

“ **Nothing gets passed you** ” Ricky said as he let out a weak chuckle “ **I guess, I guess when I saw him it reminded me of the fact that my mom lives in Chicago now. And all I can think of is if there was something that I did to push her away to a completely different state. Like itjust feels like it was my fault she left and I just feel like I fuck up every single thing I do and I just I can’t take that feeling anymore Gina. I just, I can’t.** ”

As a tear rolled down his face, Gina walked towards him and wrapped her arms around him, caressing his hair with one hand and rubbing his back with the other. He hugged back, tightly, and let out all the tears he’d been holding in for a while.

After about five minutes, he pulled away and she did the same.

“ **Ricky, you know your mom leaving isn’t your fault right? Sometimes things like that happen and it sucks, I know that, but you can’t go back in time and change it. All you can do is just move forward and try to focus on what makes you happy. Your mom leaving isn’t on you, that’s on her. And you don’t fuck up everything Ricky, that’s literally impossible”** She sent him a soft smile in which he responded with a smile and small chuckle **“What you’re feeling right now? It isn’t going to last forever and I know that right now it feels like it will never go away and you feel like you won’t ever be okay, but it will and you will be.** ”

* * *

**𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝**

**𝙉𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢, 𝙣𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙚**

**𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙨 𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙛𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙚𝙣𝙙**

**𝘽𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨**

Ricky just looked at her,  _ How is she so good at this? How does she always manage to make me feel a thousand times better? _

“ **How do you always find a way to make me feel better about these things, do you have magic healing powers?** ” he joked, resting his hands on the table and leaning back.

She let out a small giggle “ **Like I’ve told you before, I’ve had a lot of feelings in my life and trust me, I’ve been here, maybe not for the exact same reasons as you, but I’ve had that feeling of just wanting to completely disappear off the face of the earth** ”

Ricky looked at her in surprise,  _ Why hasn’t she ever told me that? _

“ **Really? So that’s how you always have the right thing to say, huh?** ”

“ **I guess so, yeah** ” she sat down on one of the chairs in the dressing room and continued “ **There was a day where it was all too much for me and I just needed an out, I needed a way to escape from every single thing. I went to this bridge and I just stood on the ledge looking down, thinking about whether it would matter if I jumped or not. And every time I felt that way, I hoped and I prayed that someone would just tell me it was all going to be okay, that I was going to be okay, and that I didn’t need to do something like that. A part of me knew I would be okay eventually, but the other part of me needed to hear someone else say it out loud so that I could actually believe it** ”

“ **If I knew you when you felt that way, I would have told you. I would have done everything I could to tell you you’d be alright** ”

Gina let out a smile, she’d never shared that story with anyone. His response was better than anything she’d ever expected.

“ **Well, it’s in the past, but thank you** ”

Ricky didn’t respond, he just looked at her, getting lost in her eyes. And she did the same.

Their moment was cut short, when Carlos walked in urging Ricky to get back in the show. Ricky looked towards Gina and she just gave him a reassuring nod and smile.

Ricky was about to walk out until Gina stopped him.

“ **Ricky, wait** ”

He stops and looks at her, waiting to hear what she has to say.

“ **You’re gonna do great** ”

“ **You really think?** ”

“ **I think that as long as you’re doing what makes you happy, it will be amazing** ”

He smiles and gives her a kiss on the cheek as a thank you. And with that he walks away and back onto the stage.

* * *

**𝙁𝙤𝙧 𝙖 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙄 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙢𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙙𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙡𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩**

**𝙎𝙤 𝙄 𝙩𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄 𝙡𝙚𝙛𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙙**

**𝙄 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙠𝙚𝙥𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚**

Gina watched as Nini and Ricky performed ‘Breaking Free’. She couldn’t help but think that maybe after the performance Ricky would come to her and tell her that he wanted to be with her, since their moment had been cut short by Carlos a few minutes earlier.

As she watched Ricky and Nini singing, holding hands and smiling at each other, she couldn’t help but feel like she was completely fooling herself thinking Ricky would want to be with her, like it was always going to be Nini and she didn’t even stand a chance.

As soon as the play was over Ricky and Nini went backstage together. Gina turned to try and catch up with Ricky, until Ej came up to her and started asking what had been going on with Ricky.

Ricky and Nini were in the dressing room and an awkward silence filled the air, until Nini spoke up.

“ **You did great, I don’t really know what happened to you there, but I know that you did great** ”

Ricky looked at her, he wanted to say those words he’d been wanting to say for months but instead all that came out was a simple “ **Thanks, you did great too** ” and with that Nini headed out the door.

Without thinking and before she went out the door, Ricky finally said it.

“ **I love you** ”

And with that Nini turned back around to look at him as he expressed how long he'd loved her with a huge smile across her face.

Once Gina finished telling Ej what happened to Ricky, leaving out certain parts, she walked towards the dressing room. She was still holding out hope that Ricky would tell her he had feelings for her, but when she heard his voice coming out of the room, her heart shattered.

“ **_–but I do, I love you. I’ve loved you since seventh grade when–_ ** _ ” _

As Gina heard those words, she could feel her heart drop.  _ Of course he’s still in love with her, why wouldn’t he be. _

* * *

**𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙢𝙚 𝙝𝙤𝙥𝙚**

**𝙎𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙨**

“ **Hey Gina** ”

Ashlyn had come up to her, which Gina didn’t mind, anything to keep her from having to think about the fact that the guy she was in love with was in love with someone else and was confessing it a few feet away.

“ **Yeah hey, what’s up** ”

“ **Well usually the theatre kids go to Denny’s but I was thinking that since you just got here today, me, you, and Ej could all skip Denny’s and help get you comfy at our house tonight** ”

Gina loved the idea, especially because it meant she wouldn’t have to see Ricky or Ricky and Nini together.

“ **Yeah Ash, that actually sounds great** ”

“ **Okay great, I’ll go tell Ej and then we’ll meet as his car, ok?** ”

“ **Okay yeah cool** ”

As Ashlyn walked away she noticed Ricky coming out of the dressing room, and he was walking right towards her, the last thing she wanted.

“ **Hey Gina, I’m sorry we had to cut everything short earlier** ”

“ **Yeah, don’t worry about it** ” Gina painted a smile across her face. She couldn’t stand to look at him without wanting to cry and so she put all her attention on the posters hanging on the wall behind him.

Ricky didn’t seem to notice the fake smile she had on or the fact that she wasn’t looking at him.

“ **Well anyways, I took your advice and did what makes me happy** ”

“ **Oh, uh, really? And what’s that?** ” Gina knew what he was talking about, but she asked anyways hoping it was just something her imagination had come up with.

“ **I was finally able to tell Nini I loved her and I kissed her** ” Ricky had a huge smile across his face.

“ **Oh, Ricky that’s amazing, I’m very happy for you** ” she lied to him, she felt her heart shatter as it all became too real. All she wanted to do was get away from him as quickly as possible.

“ **Anyways I have to go. The Caswells and I are going to set up some stuff for me tonight so we’re skipping out on Denny’s, but I’ll catch you later bye** ”

Ricky stood there, confused, something felt different, but he didn’t say anything about it.

“ **Oh okay, bye I guess** ”

And with that Gina walked away from him, holding back the tears in her eyes.

* * *

** 𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝 **

** 𝙉𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢, 𝙣𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙚 **

** 𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙨 𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙛𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙚𝙣𝙙 **

** 𝘽𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 **

Gina was finally adjusted into her new home at the Caswell household. She jumped onto her new bed and let out a huge tired sigh, and Ashlyn and Ej joined her.

“ **So you and Ricky? How is that goin?** ” Ej looks at Gina, suggesting her and Ricky are dating or something of the sort.

“ **Ricky? Uh we’re no a thing, besides he’s with Nini now** ”

Ashlyn looks at Gina confused. “ **He’s back with Nini? Since when did they-** ”

“ **Since tonight** ” Gina closed her eyes, feeling tears wanting to come out.

Both Caswells let out an “ **Oh** ” and didn’t know what to say next.

“ **Look I just kinda want to be alone for the rest of the night. I need to just escape my thoughts so I think I’m just gonna go out for a jog by the bridge or something** ”

“ **Okay, but don’t be out too long, our parents may not be here, but I think they’ll notice if one of the three of us is missing tomorrow morning** ” Ej said, waiting for Ashlyn to shoot back with a witty remark.

“ **Yeah what Mr. ‘sneaks out at 3 in the morning’ said. And just take your phone and be careful** ”

“ **Yeah I will, I’ll be back soon** ”

And with that Gina went out the house and jogged towards the bridge, the thought of Ricky and Nini and Ricky’s ‘I love you’ to Nini consuming her. The more she kept thinking about it, the faster she would run.

* * *

**𝙄𝙩’𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙥𝙪𝙡𝙡 𝙢𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙞𝙩 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙪𝙗𝙩𝙨**

**𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙢𝙮 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙤𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣**

**𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙝𝙞𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙩𝙩𝙤𝙢, 𝙣𝙤, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙢𝙚 𝙙𝙧𝙤𝙬𝙣**

Ricky had driven Nini home after dinner at Denny’s and kissed her goodbye. But before she stepped out of the car, she asked Ricky something that had been stuck in her mind for a while now.

“ **Hey Ricky can I ask you something?** ”

“ **Of course** ” Ricky sent her a soft smile.

“ **What was going on between you and Gina? Were you two dating or something? What was all of that about?** ”

“ **Me and Gina?** ” Ricky was caught by surprise with the question “ **Well, that’s a long story, but basically she saved me** ” 

“ **She saved you?** ” Nini was confused,  _ how did Gina save him? _

Ricky let out a small smile as he thought about everything that he’d been through and how Gina was always there.

“ **Yeah. Well, to be entirely honest, for the last few months, I haven’t exactly been feeling great. A while ago, I was at the skatepark trying out moves on my board that I knew I couldn’t do. I uh...I was trying to–”** Ricky paused, unsure if he should tell her the truth, but he felt like he should “ **I was trying to hurt myself.”** Ricky didn’t look towards Nini, he was scared to see what her reaction was “ **And well I did. I fell and my knees were bleeding...a lot. And Gina was there babysitting and she ran up to me with this small first aid kit she had, I guess it was meant for the kid she was watching, and she bandaged me up and made me so much feel better and while she was putting the bandage on me I explained to her how I was feeling about my parents divorce and to my surprise, she completely understood because her parents are divorced too.** ”

“ **Wow, Gina the nurse, she really can do everything** ” Nini smiled and looked at Ricky, waiting for him to continue.

Ricky let out a small laugh “ **Yeah, Gina the nurse. And on Thanksgiving my dad had been pushing me to call my mom and when I finally did, her new boyfriend answered and it just, it made me feel like complete shit and I just remember the overwhelming feeling of wanting to just die. And so I got some of my dad’s pills from his bathroom and before I could take any there was a knock on my doorbell and it was Gina. And when she came in, she saw what I was about to do and she just...she made me feel so much better about everything.”** Ricky took a glance over at Nini. She was just looking at him, listening contently, but it felt weird to him for some reason “ **And uh, today actually, when I wasn’t on stage I tried to take Ej’s pills until Gina walked in and stopped me and she just, she makes me feel better, you know? Like just being around her makes me happy and I don’t know I just, I–** ” Ricky paused,  _ it’s her, it’s Gina, I love Gina.  _ He looked at Nini who looked at him and smiled.

“ **You? You what?** ” Nini knew what he was going to say, but she wanted him to say it on his own.

“ **Nini I, I’m sorry, but Gina...I love Gina** ”

“ **Don’t be sorry Ricky, if I were you I’d choose her too. You’re always going to be my first love Ricky, but she’s the one you love and the one who you should be with. She literally saved your life...and more than once. She’s the one for you and you should tell her how you feel before it’s too late** ”

“ **And what if I’m already too late?** ”

“ **Ricky, you’re not going to know if you’re too late or not until you go to her** ”

Nini’s eyes were watering, she was glad that she knew Ricky loved her at some point, but it was time to finally put their relationship in the past. Their moment was nothing but bittersweet. 

“ **Goodnight Ricky** ”

She pressed her lips on his forehead and walked out of the car.

* * *

**𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝**

**𝙉𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢, 𝙣𝙤𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙢𝙚**

**𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙠𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙨 𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙛𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙚𝙣𝙙**

**𝘽𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚 𝙄’𝙫𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨, 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨**

As Ricky drove towards the Caswell residence, he couldn’t stop thinking about how he was in love with THE Gina Porter and how there was a likely chance that she felt the same way. A small part of him was terrified that he would be too late or that she didn't feel the same, but he tried not to focus on the thought.

As Ricky pulled into the Caswell’s driveway, he got out of his car and walked towards the door, realizing he didn’t really know what he was going to tell Gina. He decided that he would just say what felt right in the moment. He quickly rang the doorbell before his mind could convince him that this was a bad idea and that he should just head home.

Ej had opened the door and Ashlyn had been standing next to him, peeking to see who was knocking on their door so late at night.

“ **Shouldn’t you be out shoving your tongue down Nini’s throat?** ” Ashlyn and Ricky both looked at Ej with a raised eyebrow and a disgusted expression.

Ashlyn chose to ignore what Ej said and asked Ricky why he was at their house

“ **What my cousin here is trying to ask is, what are you doing here?** ”

“ **Well uh, I came to talk to Gina, I have to tell her something important** ” Ricky felt nervous, his hands began to sweat.

“ **If it’s that you’re in tonguing out with Nini, don’t worry she already knows** ”

“ **Ej that’s gross, please stop mentioning their tongues** ” she hit Ej on the back of the head and turned towards Ricky.

“ **What is so important that you have to tell her now...this late at night** ”

“ **Well uh I have to tell her that me and Nini are not back together and that…and that I…that I love her…that I’m in love with her** ”

Ashlyn and Ej looked at each other and then Ricky, letting out the same question in surprise.

“ **You what?!** ”

“ **Uh yeah, I love her”** he felt sure, his hands stopped sweating and he smiled. He wasn't nervous anymore, he loved Gina and he wanted to tell her “ **So is she here** ”

“ **No, she isn’t here actually** ” Ashlyn replied “ **she said she was going out for a jog by the bridge, something about needing to escape and wanting to be alone, she shouldn’t be long** ”

Ricky remembered the story Gina told him in a matter of seconds, the story about how she wanted to escape and tried to jump off a bridge years ago. He couldn’t help but feel a rush of panic.

“ **She said those words? An escape? A bridge?** ”

“ **Uh yeah** ” Ej looked at him, noticing that the expression on his face was the same as earlier in the dressing room “ **Is there something we’re missing? Why do you have that look on your face** ”

“ **I think...I think Gina is going to try and jump off that bridge she’s running to...I’m not sure, but she told me a story about how she tried to jump off a bridge years ago and this just sounds all too familiar** ”

Ashlyn and Ej both looked at each other in a panic, they put their shoes on and rushed out quickly. Ej told Ricky that he would drive since Ricky didn’t look like he was in the right headspace.

The entire car ride from the Caswell residence to the bridge, Ricky kept repeating the same sentence over and over again in his head, not believing it for one second.  _ Gina is okay, Everything is going to be fine. We’re going to find Gina and she is going to be okay. _

Once they were near the bridge, Ricky looked out the window trying to see if Gina was there. He couldn’t see anything due to the pouring rain, but the closer they got the more scared he got.

They finally got on the bridge and Gina was there. Standing on the ledge of the bridge. If she took one step forward, she would fall right into the deep waters beneath her.

Ricky didn’t know what to do,  _ She is always there to save me, what if I can’t do the same for her? _

Ashlyn and Ej walked forward closer to Gina, and Ricky stopped them.

“ **No. Let me talk to her. Please** ”

They nodded and went back into the car as Ricky walked near Gina.

Gina could hear the sound of footsteps and turned her head around to see him. To see the one person she didn’t want to see ever again.

“ **Gina, please don’t do this** ” Ricky could feel tears flowing down his face, but he didn’t care, he just wanted Gina in his arms.

Gina turned her head back and just looked down at the water. “ **Why does it matter to you anyways? You’ll be able to forget about me, you have Nini. Because it’s always going to be her.** ” Gina let out a scoff “ **You know something Ricky? A part of me actually thought that we could have been together and then I realized how fucking stupid that was. I mean you’ve been in love with Nini since forever, I heard the speech, she’s it for you.** ” Gina couldn’t help but let out a tear “ **You know that feeling sucks, loving someone and not having them love you back. But you know I should be used to it at this point** ” she let out a sad laugh. “ **You know why my dad left Ricky? It was because he didn’t love me. It was because he thought that me and my mom were incapable of being loved and so he left. And my mom? She projected all the hatred she had for my dad onto me, she tells me she loves me, but she never shows it, never tries to prove it, nothing. Do you know how that feels? To feel like no one could ever love you, to feel like you’re incapable of being loved by another human?** ” She turned her head back towards Ricky and let out a sad chuckle to try and cover up the fact that she was now drenched in tears “ **Who am I kidding you wouldn’t know how that feels. You’re Ricky Bowen, everyone is in love with you. But me? No one loves me. So now I’m here, on this ledge, because what’s the point? What’s the point of being here if no one is ever gonna love me? What’s the point of living if I’m just going to be alone forever?** ”

“ **Gina, you are capable of being loved. You know how I know?** ” Ricky knew what he was going to say and he didn’t have to think twice about it “ **because I love you. Because I’m in love with you and I could never, ever forget about you. And I know I told Nini I loved her, but that was how I felt months ago, now...now it’s different. Now you’re here and there isn’t even a choice because I’m in love with you and I don’t think I will ever stop being in love with you because you’re it for me Gina, you’re the one I love and the one I want to be with forever. And I’m so, so sorry that I was a part of the reason that you feel this way. I will do whatever it takes, every single day, for the rest of my life, to prove to you that you deserve to be loved. Because you do Gina and I do. I love you, Gina Porter, I’m in love with you** .”

Ricky held out his hand for her to grab and with no hesitation, she grabbed it.

When Gina finally landed her feet on the ground Ricky pulled her into the tightest hug he could give her and she held him as tight as she could, neither of them wanting to let go.

And she whispered to him “ **don’t let me go** ”

“ **I will never, ever let you go** ”, he whispered back.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!


End file.
